Thanksgiving
by Confused and UntapdTreasure
Summary: Her heart had ached for him as she looked around the room. It was full of people, but she'd never felt more alone.
1. Chapter 1

Thanksgiving

authors: The Confused One & UntapdTreasure

rated: m (for later chapters)

summary: Her heart had ached for him as she looked around the room. It was full of people, but she'd never felt more alone.

a/n: We know it has been a long, long time since we've put up anything, but things should get back to good pretty soon. We haven't abandoned When It Rains. We just had to put it on hiatus. So bear with us while we get our bearings and we'll have updates for you soon.

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It was Wednesday afternoon. The day before Thanksgiving. They'd just been given the all clear to leave. She looked up as Bobby gathered his things. He was leaving. She couldn't believe it. She stood quickly. "Hey...wait for me. I wanted to talk to you."

Bobby frowned. He looked up from his portfolio. "I... Ok... What is it, Eames?" He just wanted to get away, to relax and try to forget the holiday. He needed her, but he knew that was out of his reach. He would take peace, quiet, and serenity instead.

She shoved her laptop in her bag and grabbed her jacket. "We can talk on the way out..." She gave him a soft smile as she moved around their desks.

Bobby swallowed hard. He took his things and followed her to the elevator, apprehensively. If it was another offer to join her family, he just couldn't do that. He shook his head. "If...this is about dinner at your parents again, Eames, I'm really not up to it..."

She shook her head. "No. No. I gave up on that. I understand..." She had tried for two weeks to convince him to come, and got nowhere. She pulled something from her pocket. "Just...I wanted to give you something." She shoved the somewhat bulky envelop in his hand. "And I'm not taking no for an answer on this one."

Bobby frowned. Taking the envelope, he studied it. He glanced up at her. "What is it?" He started to open it.

"Directions and keys to the Eames' family cabin. It's empty...electricity is on, running water..." She hitched up her bag on her arm when it started to slide. "The only thing you'll need is food."

Bobby was stunned. He shook his head, trying to hand it back to her. "No. No, Eames, I can't do that. It's your family's..."

She refused to take it back. "Nope. I want you to take them...and go, please?"

Bobby sighed, defeated. He put the envelope in his pocket. "OK.. Ok. Thank you. I promise I won't mess anything up or hurt anything while I'm there. I'll clean up after myself..."

She rolled her eyes and stepped off the elevator first. "Goren, knock it off. I know you'll leave it the way you found it." She trusted him. "I just want you to relax...enjoy the quiet."

Bobby swallowed hard. He nodded, gratefully. "Thank you. Really. It means a lot..."

When she reached her car, she stepped forward and hugged him gently. "I worry about you..." she said softly. "Take care of yourself...and call me whenever you need me."

Bobby nodded softly. He closed his eyes and let himself hug her. He sighed softly and assured her, "I will... I promise I'll be OK, and I'll call you."

"Thank you..." She let herself stay in his arms a moment longer and finally pulled away. "Bye, Bobby." She unlocked her car and slid behind the wheel.

Bobby took a shaky breath. He closed his eyes again and then made his way to his car. Getting into the car, he thought about his options. Finally driving home, he packed a bag, pulled out Alex directions, and started on the road. He'd stop when he was closer for some groceries. Being out of the city might do him some good. At the very least he wouldn't be bonbarded by thoughts and images of Thanksgiving. He had lost way too much the last two years for that.

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Alex couldn't believe she was doing this. She glanced up at the sky as she parked the car and pulled the basket from the seat. It looked like rain. She glanced at other car in the driveway and her heart skipped a beat. What was she doing? She moved to the door and knocked.

A/N: We know that's mean to end the chapter there, but do you really want more?


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Bobby was reading when heard the knock on the door. He was actually a little relaxed. Putting his glass of scotch and book down, he moved to the door. Frowning, he looked through the peep hole. It was Alex. Surprised, he cautiously opened the door. "Alex, I... What are you doing here? I thought you'd be having dinner with your family."

She held the basket of food that her mother packed up so that he could see it. "I was told to follow my heart...and here...I am..." Her heart was thudding in her chest. _Had coming here been the right thing to do? Would he ask her to leave? Would he leave?_

Bobby was taken aback. He swallowed hard. "Eames... I... You didn't have to come up here, but..." He couldn't send her away. Defeated, he stepped aside. "Come in..."

Alex stepped past him. "Bobby, we're not at work. Alex..."

Bobby swallowed hard. He nodded. He closed the door behind them. Turning to face her. "OK, Alex..." He swallowed hard. He was at a total loss. "I was just...reading. What...did you bring?" He didn't want to even think about the first part she had said.

Alex handed him the basket. "I'm not sure what all she stuck in there. The usuals...some turkey and dressing for sure." Mary Eames knew her daughter liked to eat. She watched as he sat it down. She looked around in the family area of the cabin. She noted the scotch and frowned, but didn't say anything. "I...don't know what you usually eat...at Thanksgiving."

Looking through the baskets, Bobby practically stumbled over his words. "This-this is what I...usually eat. It's...fine..." He couldn't believe she had brought anything at all. He looked up at Alex. "You... You really didn't have to bring all of this food here." He hadn't been sure he wanted anything close to a tranditional Thanksgiving dinner.

Alex turned slowly and frowned. "Do you want...me to leave?"

Bobby lifted his head and met her eyes. "I... No. No, it's fine. I mean, it's your place. I'm the one... I could go."

Alex shook her head. "No." She moved past him. "Enjoy the food, Bobby. I'll go. I shouldn't have come here." _Why had she listened to her mother? Why had she humaliated herself like this?_

Bobby frowned. His heart jumped a little. He wanted her to stay. Turning to her, he chased after her. "Alex. Alex, wait... I...didn't say... I don't want you to leave."

Alex stopped with her back to him. "I don't know...what I thought would happen when I came here...I was just..." _Following my heart._

Bobby swallowed hard. He stepped towards her. "Alex, I... What did you mean when you said you were...following your heart?"

Alex swallowed hard, trying to make her heart slow down. She cleared her throat. "I wanted...to be with you." Her voice was low and soft as she turned to face him. Meeting his eyes, she tilted her head. "I didn't even have to think about where to go when my mother placed the basket in my hands and pushed me out of the house. I needed you."

Bobby took a ragged breath. He searched her eyes. "And I need you..." He closed his eyes. "You're so good for me. You don't even know. I think there are maybe three people I trust anymore, and you're number one. I...want you to stay."

Alex stepped forward, placing her hand to his cheek. "I want to stay too..." she breathed softy.

Bobby closed his eyes, leaning into his touch. He couldn't help himself. "Alex..." His mind was whirling with possibilities. After a moment, he finally snapped out of it. He moved away and grabbed the basket. "Let's get a couple of plates. Do this right."

Her mouth twitched into a smile. She'd been expecting a kiss. She moved behind him. "Plates...right..."

Bobby swallowed hard. He watched her pass him. Closing his eyes, he let out a heavy breath. He grabbed the table and took a couple of deep breaths. He finally grabbed the basket and joined her in the kitchen. "Here we go... We can unload it all..."

Alex started helping him pull things out of the basket. "There is enough in here to feed a whole family..." She trailed off. Bobby was her family. "So...its just enough for us."

Bobby glanced at her. He swallowed hard, hesitating before nodding. "You're right. It...should be just enough..." He tried to give her a small smile. He was struggling with all of this.

Alex filled her plate. She wasn't one of those girls that ate only a little because her man was around. _Her man, seriously Eames...get a hold of yourself. _She took not one but two rolls. "Did you want to eat in front of the fire?"

Bobby glanced at her. He was filling his own plate. He nodded. "Sure. If that's where you want to eat..." He was still timidly trying to figure out what was going on.

She shrugged and moved back to the fireplace. Settling down on the rug, she sighed softly. "Mom makes a mean pecan pie. She sent us a whole one."

Bobby raised his eyebrows. He moved and sat down beside her. "That's a lot of pie..." He reached over and grabbed his glass of scotch. Nervous, he took a gulp.

"What's with the scotch?" She took a bite as she waited for him to answer.

Bobby shrugged. He sighed softly. "I just wanted some scotch while I was reading."

Alex dug into her mashed potatoes. She noticed that Bobby didn't have any on his plate. "Come on..." She took a forkful. "You have to at least try Beth's potatoes. She'll ask..."

Bobby gave her a small smile. He nodded. "Alright. Alright. I'll try the potatoes."

She moved the fork to his mouth and met his eyes. "They're really good..." she said softly.

Bobby couldn't take his eyes off of her. "I believe you." He took the bite, still not taking his eyes off of her. Swallowing hard, he whispered, "You're right. Those are good."

Alex swallowed hard. He hadn't even really tasted them, just swallowed. She licked her lips. "Yeah?" she asked softly, her fork lowering. She slowly moved her head toward him.

Bobby swallowed hard. He leaned forward, closing the distance. He kissed her. It was short and tentative. Unsure, he pulled back. Meeting her eyes, he was horrified. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry... I didn't mean..." He moved away from her a little, trying to creat distance.

Alex's heart sank. "You didn't want...to kiss me?" Her question was so honest, so innocent.

A/N: We meant to have this up sooner. Sorry for the delay. More chapters to come. We will beupdating Shades of Gray soon as well.


	3. Chapter 3

-1Chapter 3

Bobby breath hitched in his throat. He swallowed hard, finally venturing to look at her. "Of course I wanted to. I've wanted to...for years... I just... I know you could never feel the same way about me..." He didn't deserve her. People who loved him got hurt. People he cared about didn't stay.

Alex sat her plate aside and moved closer to him. "Why can't I?" She turned his face so that she was looking into his eyes.

Bobby's eyes were wide and scattered. He shook his head. "Because... Because that will only get you hurt... You have to go...protect yourself. I've already hurt you enough." He jumped up. Practically shaking, he started to grab his things. He had to get away. He was panicking.

Alex was on her feet then. She moved to block his exit. "So your saying that you...are too afraid to be with me? That you don't think I'm worth the risk?"

Tears started dripping down his face. He shook his head. "I'm...saying I...love you. I love you so much it hurts, and now you know. I'm saying that everyone I love, everyone who cares about me ends up hurt somehow. I've already hurt you. I don't want to hurt you anymore.

She took his face in her hands. "Can't you see that...that I'm here? That I love you so much that my heart wasn't in my family because you…weren't with me? I love you, Bobby, and I need you...at work, at home, in my..." She placed his hand over her heart. "heart."

Bobby closed his eyes. Tears continued to move down his cheeks. "I... That's what I want too. You're my whole world. If I...lost you, I-I don't know what I'd do..." He was practically shaking.

Alex kissed him, long and slow. She refused to let him pull away. She held him to her waiting for him to respond.

With a soft groan, Bobby kissed her in return. Kissing her deeply, he pulled her to him. Wrapping his arms around her, he never wanted to let her go. In that moment, it was only the two of them. In that moment, it was perfect and everything else faded away.

Alex's hands were in his hair. She had never felt more alive, more wanted than in this moment. She pulled back breathless, meeting his eyes. "Please stay..."

Bobby took a shaky breath. He searched her eyes. She was offering him everything she had ever wanted. Her. Her undying love. "I...don't deserve you. I'm not nearly good enough, and after everything I've put you through the last two years... I don't know how you could ever...love me."

She took his face in her hands again. "Don't put yourself down, Bobby...please? for me?" She kissed him again. "I do...I love you. I'm never going...to leave you."

Bobby closed his eyes. Another tear slid down his cheek. "And I... And I trust you... I believe that. I believe you." He kissed her again.

She pulled him closer as the kiss ended. She laid her head on his chest and whispered, "We probably need to eat...and we can talk."

Bobby closed his eyes. He sighed softly. "Right... Yeah..." He closed his eyes. He pulled back. He hesitated a moment before taking her hand. He walked with her back to where the food was.

Alex settled on the floor, sitting Indian-style. She glanced up at him as she settled her plate in her lap again. She picked at her food. "You're a good kisser."

Bobby raised his eyebrows, glancing at her. He couldn't help but smile just a little. "I'm...glad you think so..." He had had a lot of practice.

She touched her lips at the memory. "Was that a total dumb thing to say?" She hadn't gone out with anyone that she really cared about in a long time.

Bobby looked at her, surprised. He shook his head. "No. Of course. I... I liked hearing that." He gave her a small smile.

She leaned over and kissed his cheek. She could feel the heat creeping up her cheeks then. She pulled back quickly and said, "Did you have any trouble finding the cabin?"

Bobby shook his head. He swallowed hard. "No. No, it was easy to find..."

Alex took a bite of turkey and smiled. "I spent a lot of time up here as a kid. Almost burned it down when I was seven." She smiled at the memory.

A/N: We hope we're still holding your attention…are we? Leave us a review and tell us what you think so far.


	4. Chapter 4

-1Chapter 4

Bobby grinned. He took a bite of his green beans. "Oh yeah? How did you manage that?"

Alex started to chuckle. "I wanted to be a Boy Scout..."

Bobby laughed now. He shook his head. "You wanted to be like your brothers."

Alex frowned. "I sure wasn't into Barbie dolls..."

Bobby smiled. He nodded in understanding. "You were a tomboy growing up. You still are. You became a cop."

She met his eyes. "That had nothing to do with why I became a cop." She looked away quickly.

Bobby raised his eyebrows. He knew they were getting into something she probably didn't want to talk about, but he couldn't help himself. "Then why did you become a cop?"

She tilted her head and closed her eyes. "Bobby..."

Bobby swallowed hard and nodded. "I'm sorry. That's none of my business. I know." He sighed and took another bite of his food. He ventured, "This food really is great..." He knew it was a bad segway, but he wasn't going to push something she didn't want to talk about.

Alex looked up, smiling faintly. "One trait that I didn't inherit was cooking."

Bobby snorted. He shook his head. "I'm sure you're a great cook. You made spaghetti for us one night, and it was very good."

She blushed. "My neighbor brought that...over before you got there. I...it felt good when you praised it so I didn't correct you..."

Bobby smirked. He leaned over and kissed her. "You don't have to impress me. I love you, and you're the best thing to ever happen to me."

Alex blushed again. She met his eyes. "I love you too...very much."

Bobby searched her eyes. He reached out and searched her eyes. He took a deep breath. "You have no idea...how much you mean to me. That you...are my rock. I...couldn't survive losing you."

Alex pulled back and picked at her food. She whispered, "You didn't let me in much the past year..."

Bobby closed his eyes. He sighed and looked back at his food. "No one needs to deal with some of the stuff that's been going through my head."

She frowned and argued, "I don't believe that's a choice you can make for someone else. Not for me anyhow." Bobby sighed. He couldn't look at her. "If I didn't let you...get too close...it wouldn't hurt so bad...when you were gone... That's...not something you wanted to hear."

Alex narrowed her eyes and thought for a long time before answering, "Aside from that letter...I haven't ever thought about leaving."

Bobby sighed. He shook his head. "Not... Alex, within the last...year and half...I've lost all the family I had left. I have...very, very few people I care about left. You... You're one of them, and I... I know it's ridiculous. You're so deep in my heart that it doesn't matter how much distance I tried to put between us, it would kill me if I lost you. If something happened to you..."

Alex met his eyes. "I am not going anywhere. You're not going to lose me. I couldn't do that to you."

Bobby shook his head. He took a shaky breath. Before he could stop himself, he replied, "You...can't do that. You can't promise me that. Anyone can go...at anytime... You have no control over that."

Alex frowned and pushed herself to her feet. "You'd think I would've learned that after burying my husband..."

Bobby watched her. He sighed heavily. "It's one of those lessons life...keeps teaching you."

Alex moved to the kitchen with her plate. "You should've learned to...nevermind." She ran her hand through her hair.

Bobby frowned. Grabbing his plate, he got up and followed her. "Should have what? I should have what, Eames? Learned to deal with losing people already? Be fine now?"

Alex closed her eyes. "that is not what I said. I didn't..." Her hands clutched the counter edge.

Bobby glared at her, placing his dishes in the sink. "Then what did you mean?"

"That u can live with your grief. You have to...find away to make it part of you but not let it consume you." Losing Joe would've destroyed her had she let it.

A/N: No, the confused one isn't back, but I wanted to give her something to look forward to when she returned. We have this finished it just needs a little work so I thought I'd post it so that no one forgets her. Not that any of us could, right?


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